Tears. I am speechless. This is so beautiful out of such horror. If only the girl with the crickets could read this and find you. This is how I feel for my daughter who has been so cruel. I have told her this once but want to say it again. Thank you for reminding me that in my quest to tear down this ideology, it all boils down to us loving the kids. Thank you, Jamie.
And that is the thing. These kids are being told their parents and those like you don't understand, don't 'get it', when in fact we do only too well, and it's only our experiences that allows us to see what they can't, and see it clearly for what it is.
I have mixed feelings about this essay. On one hand, I am moved by the author's compassion for the young woman and empathize with her own story. On the other, I don't think it's right or healthy to put all the blame on men ("Adult men have led her to believe that I am the enemy."). Women are just as guilty in promoting trans ideology, in confusing these young people. We shouldn't throw men under the bus. All adults are responsible. We need to fix it together - men and women.
There is context you’re missing. A group of maligned men coordinated this attack and used these confused young women as a shield. Holding those predatory men accountable is very much warranted.
Powerful and moving story, Jamie. It’s a shocking thing to ever have to hear the target was you and to have to live a life in fear. My only consolation is that you didn’t have to go it alone and were surrounded by such strong warriors.
I agree, we need to reach these kids and show them the utmost compassion. They have been lied to and it’s not their fault. I took one look at the pictures and thought “well, there’s a baby dyke in distress”. All dressed up in her best jacket and, prior to the cricket release, apparently eating biscuits and chatting to people. Found her tribe, I thought, and how fucking lovely she finally gets to meet everyone. It made my heart warm when I heard Kate went to talk to her - it was a remarkably kind thing to do.
One my one, we will drag them back and tell these kids they are loved and perfect just the way they are.
In the early 1990s in the UK I was asked to support a young man who had been sexually abused. The lad was only 19 and was living with a girl who was also very vulnerable. His story was a painful one. He had had a sex change operation from female to male when he was 16 because he'd been repeatedly sexually abused and raped by his father and 4 brothers, and he said that he thought that if he changed sex from female to male that he would become a new person and the abuse would stop. But he said he was still in terrible mental pain and 'couldn't understand why the memories hadn't gone away'. He had assumed that if he rid himself of his female body, the memories associated with that body would disappear too. I asked if anyone at the hospital or the psychiatric team had ever asked why he wanted the sex change. He said no they hadn't. Not a single person had asked why he wanted it. Now he was really upset and said he wished someone had told him that the memories wouldn't go away, because that's what he'd really wanted. He'd wanted to be safe from abuse and free of the pain and memories. (Because I know anything anyone says on this subject can be taken the wrong way and the speaker vilified, I'd just like to clarify that I am in no way suggesting that all sex change decisions are made because of past abuse or trying to avoid pain, however I wanted to share this true experience in the light of this post.) Young people need supportive love and counselling to identify what internal misery is causing them to be unhappy with themselves and help should be given to resolve those issues. They will then be in a better place to decide whether they want to go ahead with any irreversible procedures.
Standing with you and all women who have ever screamed NO and HELP and were dismissed, ignored, or disbelieved. So many of us "know" the reality of men's sexual/violence and will continue to scream, in union, the TRUTH of this painful (w)reckoning until the whole world finally hears us. Thank you for this piece and your voice.
Thanks, Jamie—chills for me as I read this and thought about my beautiful 19-year old who for reasons untold to me says she doesn’t want to be a woman.
The mom in me wants to weep for our girls who are ravaging themselves, maiming their bodies, before they've even grown fully into them. I'm so thankful to have stumbled upon this piece, to have read these words, to see that there are others with open arms waiting for the kids to come around and realize they are already perfect as they are. No pharmaceutical or surgical intervention is needed.
Nice comment. I’m not a Mom nor do I think one has to be one for this to make us want to weep.
Why wait for them to come around? When we see cries for help like this, I vote we move in and try to rescue them. These are kids: we are adults. Put them into a room and just keep talking to them until we get through as opposed to calling the police and having them charged. That they released crickets tells me they desperately need to talk to someone but what do I know?
On a fundamental level, I'm all for what you're saying. The problem is that the young girls ripping themselves apart and being ripped apart aren't my girls; they don't have to listen to me. Moving in too quickly and trying to persuade an unreceptive party often means further dissociation and radicalization (e.g. teenage rebellion). It's a tough balance, and I'm not sure I have the answers here.
Tears. I am speechless. This is so beautiful out of such horror. If only the girl with the crickets could read this and find you. This is how I feel for my daughter who has been so cruel. I have told her this once but want to say it again. Thank you for reminding me that in my quest to tear down this ideology, it all boils down to us loving the kids. Thank you, Jamie.
And that is the thing. These kids are being told their parents and those like you don't understand, don't 'get it', when in fact we do only too well, and it's only our experiences that allows us to see what they can't, and see it clearly for what it is.
I have mixed feelings about this essay. On one hand, I am moved by the author's compassion for the young woman and empathize with her own story. On the other, I don't think it's right or healthy to put all the blame on men ("Adult men have led her to believe that I am the enemy."). Women are just as guilty in promoting trans ideology, in confusing these young people. We shouldn't throw men under the bus. All adults are responsible. We need to fix it together - men and women.
There is context you’re missing. A group of maligned men coordinated this attack and used these confused young women as a shield. Holding those predatory men accountable is very much warranted.
Oh, I didn’t know. Can you tell me more please?
Wow.
I'm glad to be here to read this. I didn't know
This is a whopper of an article. You're a great writer and a powerful example of the meaning of courage.
The name of this Substack is well chosen.
Beautiful
I just read this again. So powerful.
Very short and extra powerful for it !
Powerful and moving story, Jamie. It’s a shocking thing to ever have to hear the target was you and to have to live a life in fear. My only consolation is that you didn’t have to go it alone and were surrounded by such strong warriors.
I agree, we need to reach these kids and show them the utmost compassion. They have been lied to and it’s not their fault. I took one look at the pictures and thought “well, there’s a baby dyke in distress”. All dressed up in her best jacket and, prior to the cricket release, apparently eating biscuits and chatting to people. Found her tribe, I thought, and how fucking lovely she finally gets to meet everyone. It made my heart warm when I heard Kate went to talk to her - it was a remarkably kind thing to do.
One my one, we will drag them back and tell these kids they are loved and perfect just the way they are.
In the early 1990s in the UK I was asked to support a young man who had been sexually abused. The lad was only 19 and was living with a girl who was also very vulnerable. His story was a painful one. He had had a sex change operation from female to male when he was 16 because he'd been repeatedly sexually abused and raped by his father and 4 brothers, and he said that he thought that if he changed sex from female to male that he would become a new person and the abuse would stop. But he said he was still in terrible mental pain and 'couldn't understand why the memories hadn't gone away'. He had assumed that if he rid himself of his female body, the memories associated with that body would disappear too. I asked if anyone at the hospital or the psychiatric team had ever asked why he wanted the sex change. He said no they hadn't. Not a single person had asked why he wanted it. Now he was really upset and said he wished someone had told him that the memories wouldn't go away, because that's what he'd really wanted. He'd wanted to be safe from abuse and free of the pain and memories. (Because I know anything anyone says on this subject can be taken the wrong way and the speaker vilified, I'd just like to clarify that I am in no way suggesting that all sex change decisions are made because of past abuse or trying to avoid pain, however I wanted to share this true experience in the light of this post.) Young people need supportive love and counselling to identify what internal misery is causing them to be unhappy with themselves and help should be given to resolve those issues. They will then be in a better place to decide whether they want to go ahead with any irreversible procedures.
Very powerful, thank you
Standing with you and all women who have ever screamed NO and HELP and were dismissed, ignored, or disbelieved. So many of us "know" the reality of men's sexual/violence and will continue to scream, in union, the TRUTH of this painful (w)reckoning until the whole world finally hears us. Thank you for this piece and your voice.
Incredible and powerful. I appreciate you sharing this essay. I hope it circulates to the ones who need to read and understand most.
Thanks, Jamie—chills for me as I read this and thought about my beautiful 19-year old who for reasons untold to me says she doesn’t want to be a woman.
The mom in me wants to weep for our girls who are ravaging themselves, maiming their bodies, before they've even grown fully into them. I'm so thankful to have stumbled upon this piece, to have read these words, to see that there are others with open arms waiting for the kids to come around and realize they are already perfect as they are. No pharmaceutical or surgical intervention is needed.
Nice comment. I’m not a Mom nor do I think one has to be one for this to make us want to weep.
Why wait for them to come around? When we see cries for help like this, I vote we move in and try to rescue them. These are kids: we are adults. Put them into a room and just keep talking to them until we get through as opposed to calling the police and having them charged. That they released crickets tells me they desperately need to talk to someone but what do I know?
On a fundamental level, I'm all for what you're saying. The problem is that the young girls ripping themselves apart and being ripped apart aren't my girls; they don't have to listen to me. Moving in too quickly and trying to persuade an unreceptive party often means further dissociation and radicalization (e.g. teenage rebellion). It's a tough balance, and I'm not sure I have the answers here.
Beautiful writing about dark subjects. Thank you for fighting for this young girl and all the others.
I’m so moved by this. Thank you ❤️