My own experience when I brought my then almost 14-year-old daughter to one of these places shortly before Covid hit (which worked out because I didn't have to argue with my daughter about why we were never going back) matches this training. She shyly asked the person at the counter what name she was supposed to put on the form. The lady loudly proclaimed: "Use your chosen name, as we will NEVER use your DEAD NAME!" She had literally just met my daughter 2 seconds earlier, but somehow knew she had a "dead name." The counselor was no better. I asked him how many people who come to this place end up following through with medical interventions. He said that basically everyone does. He then explained so patiently and sweetly that, although this may seem surprising, and he would have thought not everyone would follow through himself, in fact, everyone who comes here knows who they are. He explained that this made sense to him once he realized it was just like being gay - which he was - and so, of course, these people were very sure of what they wanted. I just smiled politely, and left as quickly as possible, a sickening feeling in my stomach. There was no point having a debate with someone so steeped in ideology - and I knew we would never be going back.
No. She used one of those apps for text therapy for a few months that, as she stated, did nothing. Then I held off. After she took illegal testosterone gel for 3 months last summer (age 16), which I discovered and immediately put to a stop, she asked for therapy. I found someone I thought might be neutral and exploratory, but she was also pretty steeped in ideology, and tried repeatedly to get me to come aboard, proclaiming that my concerns about medical intervention were all fear-based, and that she and I both couldn't possibly understand what my daughter was going through because "we're cis." Luckily, my daughter became busy with the school play and musical and then no longer had any interest in therapy, so that therapist only lasted about 3 months. Instead, she's taking voice lessons (which is good because the testosterone gel made her voice froggy and she now cracks where she didn't before). I wish I could find a therapist like Sasha Ayad or Stella O'Malley - but, at this point, I think maturity and life are the best potential ways for her to figure out that she doesn't need to pretend she is male and chemically and surgically alter her appearance in order to achieve happiness.
My own experience when I brought my then almost 14-year-old daughter to one of these places shortly before Covid hit (which worked out because I didn't have to argue with my daughter about why we were never going back) matches this training. She shyly asked the person at the counter what name she was supposed to put on the form. The lady loudly proclaimed: "Use your chosen name, as we will NEVER use your DEAD NAME!" She had literally just met my daughter 2 seconds earlier, but somehow knew she had a "dead name." The counselor was no better. I asked him how many people who come to this place end up following through with medical interventions. He said that basically everyone does. He then explained so patiently and sweetly that, although this may seem surprising, and he would have thought not everyone would follow through himself, in fact, everyone who comes here knows who they are. He explained that this made sense to him once he realized it was just like being gay - which he was - and so, of course, these people were very sure of what they wanted. I just smiled politely, and left as quickly as possible, a sickening feeling in my stomach. There was no point having a debate with someone so steeped in ideology - and I knew we would never be going back.
I hope things are going ok for you and your daughter. Did you manage to find good exploratory care?
No. She used one of those apps for text therapy for a few months that, as she stated, did nothing. Then I held off. After she took illegal testosterone gel for 3 months last summer (age 16), which I discovered and immediately put to a stop, she asked for therapy. I found someone I thought might be neutral and exploratory, but she was also pretty steeped in ideology, and tried repeatedly to get me to come aboard, proclaiming that my concerns about medical intervention were all fear-based, and that she and I both couldn't possibly understand what my daughter was going through because "we're cis." Luckily, my daughter became busy with the school play and musical and then no longer had any interest in therapy, so that therapist only lasted about 3 months. Instead, she's taking voice lessons (which is good because the testosterone gel made her voice froggy and she now cracks where she didn't before). I wish I could find a therapist like Sasha Ayad or Stella O'Malley - but, at this point, I think maturity and life are the best potential ways for her to figure out that she doesn't need to pretend she is male and chemically and surgically alter her appearance in order to achieve happiness.
I want to cry for you and give you a big hug.
I think you're obviously doing a brilliant job - you're buying her the time she needs to grow out of it (old fashioned phrase but so true).
I do sense that the spell is beginning to break amongst many young people.
I'll think of you both - stay strong.
The "no assessment needed" is key evidence of legal liability.
These guidelines read like they were written by a 15 year old.